Friday, 01 November 2019 14:09

Flying the coup over Giuliani's and Trump's Ukraine folly

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It’s only fair, for a moment, to laud President Donald Trump’s coup at killing Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi by U.S. forces and the good taste not to publish photos of officials reacting to the hit. It’s understandable if some people hesitate to utter the word “coup” because of how it’s used by Republicans to describe the impeachment inquiry being conducted in congress.

 As if anyone has forgotten, in the joy of the moment when Trump was actually presidential, the impeachment inquiry casting a pall over his administration stems from an old-fashioned Black Hand-like attempt to extort the Ukraine, a weakling state unable. It’s scarcely able to keep its dress down in faint breeze.

The reason for the administration’s slapping around of Ukraine is its impudent belief Americans care two wits about whatever garbage this wallflower nation might claim it found on Trump’s opponents. After this boondoggle, that county can expect no more than ninety-nine cents in annual foreign aid.

Even the name of the place sounds alien, more like a disease of the skin in a place not normally visible to the naked eye, than a nation. Having been evicted from Kazakhstan, the word is Borat has taken up residence there. Things are bad enough that Ukraine’s outline on a world map is now included on Rorschach tests.

Do more than Adam Schiff’s Democrats see in the blot an overweight, self-promoting TV host with his finger on a button, and it’s not the only fastener on a fashion model’s sheaf? It’s just not possible that Americans could be so susceptible to Blarney they’d give unlimited power to such a type. Not a chance it’d happen, and surely the Ukraine wouldn’t tolerate undue influence from this sort because, next to the Vatican, there is no other state with the same moral authority.

Presently, there are few places easier to exploit than Ukraine. Russia lopped off the Crimea, its richest territory with open sea access, historic trade significance, and rich mineral deposits. Paul Manafort, a one-time Trump campaign chair made boss, mined a ton advancing the short-lived political fortunes of a cut-and-run former Ukrainian president now residing in Russia.

Rudy Giuliani, a Trump successor personal attorney, between therapy appointments, was sniffing a takeover of the country’s natural gas sector, joined by some dicey duds who, previously, had slipped Trump-benefitting entities enough cash to buy lunch at a Trump club.

 Even former Veep Uncle Joe Biden’s kid, Hunter, got in on the Ukraine action, and was paid a ton to pretend he wasn’t getting the dough for an appearance of impropriety. This one may be understandable, though, since Ukraine probably missed the dismal truth Hunter’s Dad’s most visible moments came when said “ducking” before the words “big deal” after Obamacare became law, and the multiple times when Joe copped feels from the wives of appointees, and elected officials he swore into office.

In fairness, and to Joe’s credit, though, he never swooned over Obama with the misty, lovey-dovey eyes that Pence does when he adoringly looks at Trump. Maybe, it’s justified, though, and Pence, one day after his own impeachment, will get Hunter’s old job and accompanying sinecure.

It’s the way of the world to pick on the weak though, eventually, all the great are laid low, and the poor eventually inherit the earth, at least cockroaches will if we blow it all up, or watch it melt like a popsicle on a torrid day. Instead of kicking Ukraine when it’s down, maybe, next time, Trump can pick on a state better able to protect itself, like the Seychelles, or Lichtenstein. 

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